'aligned and engaged.'

Ahhhh quarterly department meetings. 1 of 4 times throughout the year hundreds of employees gather into an extremely cold boardroom to discuss metrics, bar graphs and acronyms that no one can decode. Two excruciating hours of monotone presentations set to slide shows that include a variety of clip art and animated gifs from about 1984; 1985 tops. The information is said to be of high importance and relevnace to ALL employees, regardless of their roles. I couldn't help but notice, as I glanced at other foreign people around the room, the amount of disengaged faces and blank stares. It made me laugh in my head. I was LIMH. Who are they kidding with these slide shows? The information is only relevant to about 4% of the entire room. Regardless of the shitload of shit being flashed across the screen in pie charts and bar graphs, most employees bring down a pad of paper and pen. Always. Like, classy ones that are leather-bound and engraved and shit. It's just to look involved I guess, cause hardly anyone writes down notes. See, I do take notes throughout these meetings; just in a different kinda way.

Is it friday yet? I'd like a drink.